I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
