Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Randomize
