I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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