whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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