those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
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