You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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