An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
