dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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