I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
