So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
