you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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