Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize