ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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