so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
