so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
