you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
