thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
