I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
