Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
