You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
