you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
