It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Randomize
