So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Randomize