you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
