Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
