brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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