I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Randomize
