4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
