you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
