Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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