Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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