ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
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