Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize