i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
i think i just lost a toe
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize