Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
