eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
