I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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