it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
