I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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