He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
