If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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