Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
