I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
