I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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