What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
