I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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