i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
