guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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