I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
