i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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